The Getaway Driver
Words by Aron Simkins Art by Aaron Rowell
Crew Lead: Be ready on the east side of the building by the fire doors. We’re gonna make this smash and grab fast and furious. Those jewelry store stiffs won’t know what hit ‘em.
Getaway Driver: How long has the check engine light been on in the van? We probably ought to get it looked at.
Crew Lead: Don’t worry about that right now. Just be at the doors when we’re ready. geez.
Crew Lead: Entering the vault now. Once the alarm gets triggered, we’ll have two minutes to bag the cash and clear the bank before the fuzz arrives. Have the van running on the south side.
Getaway Driver: You know, they say leaving your vehicle idling is one of the biggest contributors to air pollution and ultimately climate change. I can forward you the article I read if you want. What’s your email?
Crew Lead: Are you messing right now! We’re mid heist. Get in position.
Crew Lead: Hittin’ this food joint will be fast, easy money. Those greasy-faced youths at the counter will probably junk their jeans when we raid the registers. Are you ready to roll at the west entrance?
Getaway Driver: I’m actually in the drive through line right now. Do you guys want anything while I’m here? We probably won’t have time after.
Crew Lead: WE DON’T HAVE TIME NOW! What’s wrong with you?
Crew Lead: This is the big one. By this time tomorrow, we’ll all be on a beach somewhere with more scratch than we know how to spend. Just make sure the van is backed to the rear doors, so we can load and leave.
Getaway Driver: I actually dropped the van off to get serviced. Don’t worry though. They gave me a loaner. A Civic. And what it lacks in cargo space, it certainly makes up for in gas mileage. We just need to have it back to the dealership when the van’s done.
Crew Lead: Da fuh?