Realtor: Aren’t you two the cutest couple. How long y’all been married?

 

Wife: Just under a year.

 

Realtor: Newlyweds!

 

Husband: Feels like longer.

 

Wife: Honey!

 

Husband: What?

 

Realtor: Well, I’m just tickled pink y’all chose me as your realtor. I have a question for ya, though. I noticed you have a specific requirement you’re looking for in your new home.

 

Wife: We want a box.

 

Realtor: Yes. That was it. I just want to make sure I’m clear-as-water as to what that means exactly. 

 

Wife: Oh, you know—the typical…

 

Husband: None of that fancy box stuff. We’re on a budget.

 

Wife: Honey!

 

Husband: What?

 

Realtor: Okay. Just another question then. Could you, perhaps, describe what features ya’ll are looking for?

 

Wife: I guess four sides. 90-degree angles. Parallel lines.

 

Husband: An opening to get out.

 

Wife: Honey!

 

Husband: What?

 

Realtor: Ha. Seems like you’re describing an actual box, box.

 

Wife: Ooh, that sounds nice.

 

Husband: Sounds expensive.

 

Wife: Honey!

 

Husband: What?

 

Realtor: You aren’t kidding. Well, uh, think I have some boxes I could show you.

 

Wife: Anything in cardboard would be lovely.

 

Husband: Or maybe mime.

 

Wife: HONEY!

 

Husband: What?

 

Realtor: I apologize if I seem a bit out of sorts. I’m just not entirely sure where we keep our, uh, box portfolio. Probably in a box in the back.

 

Wife: You have boxes in the back?

 

Realtor: Um, yes. But they’re all bankers boxes.

 

Husband: Well, I’m no banker.

 

Realtor: Heh. What I mean is, I’m sure they’re not right for you.

 

Wife: Listen. Just because my husband isn’t the financial type…

 

Realtor: Oh, no. I just meant they’re small boxes. You probably wouldn’t fit comfortably...

 

Husband: Now hold on. The teeter may totter in my wife’s favor but fitting-in is something she does remarkably well.

 

Wife: Excuse me?

 

Husband: What?